May 17, 2017
This episode, we veer closer to content than ever!!!! We teach you about the law, and shop for deodorant, and talk about stuff and do all sorts of important content! Then we seemingly forget we're doing a podcast for a while. Then we do another classic Shower Cast, which turns everything around and gets everybody ready for bed! Is this the best non-episode ever?? Or the worst? You be the judge! We also interview Godzilla a little.
May 15, 2017
It's another beautiful day and you don't want to get up! But you have to! So we're here to walk you through your morning, from getting out of bed to getting to work really late! We might even interview Jeff Sessions along the way! And then do an even better interview with Academy Award winner Sean Christensen! Good Morning, HLTATMOW!!!
May 14, 2017
The podcast gets worse, then it gets better! Then worse again. Then we search how to do a podcast on the internet. I wanna say we talked about Seinfeld and Charles Dickens or something. Maybe Godzilla. Not sure. Then there was a sex doctor segment possibly. I'm probably going to delete these supplemental episodes soon, so get em while they're... whatever they are.
May 12, 2017
Matt and Dylan bring you a singular production of the very erotic public domain short story The Cask of Amontillado by Edgar Allan Poe. Plus more Jeopardy, horsey sounds, car talk, bar chat, tax discussion, Jay Leno noises, and bikes and stuff. Then everyone falls asleep. The last ten minutes or so are like a baby's nightmare, but I left it in for anthropological reasons. We also talk about Godzilla a little.
May 10, 2017
This episode we try to cash in on the popularity of food podcasts like Doughboys and The Sporkful (I assume? I don't actually know what the sporkful is) by reviewing a new flavor of chicken wings! But first, of course, we have to catch the end of Jeopardy and then order the wings and then drive to the place to get them and then evade the cops! We also talk about Godzilla a little.
May 5, 2017
Disclaimer: This is an even weirder, longer episode don't listen.
Dylan drove somewhere and needed to do a podcast to stay awake. So we talk about whatever for four hours. Night Court, Mass Effect, Game of Thrones, Conan O'Brien, Whataburger, etc. We even talked about Godzilla again for a minute or two! Plus Matt figures out how to make Dylan hear audio clips! Even if he doesn't want to! Don't bother listening if you're not a fan of the parts of the podcast where we ramble incoherently! (but remember, if you don't listen, Dylan might fall asleep at the wheel)
May 2, 2017
Disclaimer: This is a weird episode don't listen.
We watched a foreign film called Gojira, Mosura, Kingu Gidora: Daikaiju Sokogeki! It's just Matt and Dylan in this episode! Which is weird! Matt tries to get Dylan to say whether or not he'd recommend the movie for forty minutes! Then Dylan tries to make the recording unusable! Then Dylan spends the last half hour begging Matt not to release this episode! But it sounds like Matt is gonna release it! We also talk about Godzilla at some point.
Apr 18, 2017
All aboard! Train to Busan is leaving the station! Toot-toot! Where will it end up? I'm no train expert, nor do I know what such a person would be called, but my guess is it's probably going to Busan, you absolute frigging dullard! Dylan was mean to this movie but Logan and Matt are good guys to it! We disagree about whether or not the Train to Busan was better than the train from Snowpiercer! Here's an interesting fact: The name of the train from Snowpiercer was Chris Evans's Ice Train! If you don't believe me, just google Chris Evans's Ice Train and I bet Snowpiercer comes right up!!! Let's all take care of one another!! Now eat some more slop, you mindless zombies!!!!
Mar 29, 2017
It's episode 69! So we S each other's D's by talking bout movies and stuff! I Don't Feel at Home in This World Anymore was one of the main ones! It's Macon Blair's writorial-directorial debut, and Dylan has graduated from confusing him with Joe Lo Truglio to confusing him with Jeremy Saulnier. Matt and Logan start working out the sequel to Blue is the Warmest Color until Dylan shows up and they forget they were doing that. Then we talk about movies, video games, comic books and normal books! Plus we fix the national debt, complain about the proposed Netflix rating scale and try to get Logan to start smoking cigarettes! Five stars! You hear me Netflix?!! FIVE! STARS!
Mar 22, 2017
We Are Still Here! And talkin bout one of the most positively reviewed horror films of a few years ago or something! Ted Geoghegan did it! It's in the past! La La Land! I mean Moonlight!! Matt suffered a brain injury!!! He gonna be okay?! Idunno! BUT WE ARE STILL HERE, MUTHA F*$%@S!!!!!
Mar 17, 2017
This episode, we delve into an examination of suicidal depression, madness and the long road to recovery. We also talk about The Beaver. Did you know Anton Yelchin and Jennifer Lawrence were in that? We sure didn't.
Feb 22, 2017
This week we watched Grand Piano, a film some people on this podcast have called 'the dumb version of Whiplash.' Listen to us talk about how and why John Cusack and Bill S. "Alex Winter" Preston Esquire kill people to make Elijah Wood play the piano better. We tell you why Damien Chazelle seems like an evil person, but is actually better than you. We think about trying the Santa Clarita Diet, and Matt and Dylan wanna talk about Arrival, but then don't for obvious reasons. Don't be a Tom FAILZnik, be a Tom LISTENTOTHISEPZnik! Night night I have a concussion
Jan 31, 2017
We spend twenty minutes introducing The Magnificent Seven so we can give you all the interesting details, like what Aikido is and what we thought about John Wick, and also so we can name all the Skarsgards and brainstorm new snacks we could invent that might be good. This episode sponsored by Legal Zip. It's like a scam.
Jan 19, 2017
This Inauguration Day, we talk about Look Who's Back, the movie where Hitler is here again. We try not to get political. Kevin hasn't been on in a while, Matt hasn't slept in a while, and Logan hasn't seen Rogue One in an ever. I think Matt says Adolph Borat at one point, when he really should have said either Borat Hitler or Adolph Sagdiyev. Then we have a pretty weird discussion of Starwars. Er ist wieder da.
Dec 23, 2016
'Tis the season for the coming together of friends and family, the lifting of spirits, and the talking about of movies. 'Tis a special film we watched, wherein a bedraggled Paul Dano learns to share his life with a bloated and decaying Daniel Radcliffe. And yes, Mary Elizabeth Winstead was there too. This holiday season, we'd like to invite you to watch Swiss Army Man, and listen to us reminisce about times gone by when we did the same. Logan and Matt will be there, with little Dylan by the fire, playing with his brand new microphone. We do so hope that you will join us.
EDITOR'S NOTE This episode was recorded before the release of Rogue One: A Star Wars Story. Quit asking us to talk about Star Wars, nerds.